I’m officially one of the last single girls standing in my group of friends from high school. In fact, out of the seniors in our church youth group, five of us remained un-married. Three girls, two guys. Sufficient to say, I’ve been to a few weddings, seen a few pictures, and have conjured up some ideas of my own on how I’d like things done, whenever that day may come for me. ($50 says I’ll be last one out of us five singles) I’ve expressed previously, about a year ago, my fear of all-things wedding. It’s funny how that fear turned into complete peace not long after I wrote those two posts. I’m not scared of weddings, or marriage, but I do believe that when it does happen for me, it will be focused completely on the marriage, NOT the “party” or the money involved.
On the way to my friend Lisa’s bachelorette party last year, I felt completely out of place. Not only was I the only girl who wasn’t a bridesmaid who was at the celebration that began in my apartment, but I was also the only one who wasn’t already married or engaged. I rode in the back of another girl’s car texting my mom, asking her, “Do you and Dad have money already set aside for my wedding?” She was taken aback by my question, and said, “No… Why are you asking this?” All that was going through my head as I sat in the backseat was, “there is absolutely no way I can do any of this. How do I avoid all of this, but still get married?” Then, the idea came to me. City Hall. That is the only way I saw fit in my head to avoid all of this bridal shower, wedding shower, bachelorette, toilet-paper wedding gown, mumbo-jumbo. My mom told me that they would decide how much my budget at that time, and that I would seriously regret not having an “actual” wedding.
So, when I do have a wedding, whenever that may be, I’ve decided on a few things that absolutely will not take place:
- no bridal shower. no games, no toilet paper gowns, none of that.
- no cupcake gowns. no poofs. no trains. something simple.
- no sauntering down the aisle to “here comes the bride.” Canon in D, please.
- no getting married in a church. I love God, but I don’t want a traditional wedding inside of a church.
- probably little to no wedding party. Just my sister. (this may change, of course)
- no lighting of the “unity candle.”
- no generic vows. we write our own.
- no electric slide at the reception. I’ve been toying with an all-Beatles themed music for a while.
- no champagne toasting. We don’t even like champagne. Wine me.
- no removing of the garter. No garter, for that matter.
- no tossing of the bouquet.
- a bachelorette party in New York City. Or maybe Vegas.
- a simple, yet still elegant dress. I’m currently obsessing over this dress, but I’ve been feeling as if it may be a little too “promy.”
And that is all I know, for now. Stay tuned.